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courage

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My life really only started when I turned 30. Sure, that sounds crazy. But there is a significant difference in “life” and actual living. It is having the courage to walk away from something so painful and so toxic. It is having faith that no matter what foot you step out on, God is going to be in step with you. It is taking that first deep breath, exhaling all the negative and nastiness in your life and going forward, reassuring yourself you will never have to look back. And I didn’t.

I have this tattoo on my shoulder. I put it there so I’d see it all the time. It’s a constant reminder to me. It says “courage is fear that has said it’s prayers”. I don’t remember how I came across it but it was not long after my brain surgery. That one quote means everything to me. The course of events that has taken place in my life over the last seven years has been nothing short of a miracle.

February 17th is an important day to me and one I will remember like my birthday or my anniversary. I shouldn't have been surprised because there is never anything calm or "normal" in my life. I was diagnosed that day with a meningioma. A brain tumor. Would you believe how many people I've crossed paths with in the last year that have had some sort of brain issues? Random people. It is kind f like buying and driving a car. All of a sudden, everywhere you turn, everyone is driving YOUR car. In fact, not long after I had my surgery, a close friend discovered she had a brain tumor too! So now these things are literally popping up everywhere...

The out pour of love, prayers and fellowship has been amazing ever since. This experience has definitely put life into perspective. I take nothing for granted; not that I did before. You see things differently. You ignore the bullshit, you soak in every single hug, kiss, glance and smell. You embrace the good and walk away from the bad. Who needs more bad in life? You experience what truly matters. Breathing. Living. Peace. And God. 


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