I have this unfortunate flaw of being used like a yo-yo. Whether it is family or friend, it a pattern I desperately want to end. I am not a bad friend. At least I do not think so anyway. But I get into this cycle of only being needed or wanted at the convenience of others and I am getting tired of it. I don't know how to end this cycle and this is my dilemma.
I am not a mean person by nature. I never have been. Bitterness over the years has changed that some. I am far more outspoken than I used to be when I was younger. A little less naive, a little wiser but I still have a good heart. I am not one to turn my back on others, most of the time. I do have a breaking point but it seems to take awhile to get me there. I learned that after a very long, bad marriage.
I don't turn my back on others because I know what it feels like. It hurts a lot. So I feel I should not do this to others. Yet at the same time, I'm not anyone's doormat. It just does not work like that.
My other problem is confrontation. I am just not a fan. Don't get me wrong; I have zero problem telling you exactly how I feel and where you can go. I'll even help you get there. That doesn't mean I enjoy it.
So how do you tell someone you care for that you are tired of their shit without hurting their feelings?
I guess that is the million dollar question. In the mean time, what does one do in this situation? Other than ignore it and pretend like it doesn't happen...because obviously that is working out great, right?
I am not a mean person by nature. I never have been. Bitterness over the years has changed that some. I am far more outspoken than I used to be when I was younger. A little less naive, a little wiser but I still have a good heart. I am not one to turn my back on others, most of the time. I do have a breaking point but it seems to take awhile to get me there. I learned that after a very long, bad marriage.
I don't turn my back on others because I know what it feels like. It hurts a lot. So I feel I should not do this to others. Yet at the same time, I'm not anyone's doormat. It just does not work like that.
My other problem is confrontation. I am just not a fan. Don't get me wrong; I have zero problem telling you exactly how I feel and where you can go. I'll even help you get there. That doesn't mean I enjoy it.
So how do you tell someone you care for that you are tired of their shit without hurting their feelings?
I guess that is the million dollar question. In the mean time, what does one do in this situation? Other than ignore it and pretend like it doesn't happen...because obviously that is working out great, right?
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