If You Only Knew

There has never been a worse feeling than waking up at 2am, only to roll over and your husband isn't there. This isn't the first time it's happened but for some reason, last night was different. Normally, it's waking up in the morning after having a dream and then seeing his spot empty. Last night was different because it was almost shocking. It was as if this last month had just been a dream and he was home all along. Sadly, it's reality. I knew when I met Matt that he was going to be deployed. Actually, I knew before I met Matt. One of his co-workers was dating a friend of mine. So when things started to get serious between us, I already knew what I was getting into. Or so I thought anyway. I've grown up in the military all of my life. Both of my parents were retired Air Force, my brother served in the Navy and many of my grandparents, unc les and so forth had served as well. Even my ex-husband served in the Army. And knowing everything that I know about the m...

Look closely. What do you see? That smile reads pure joy. Love. Loyalty. Passion. How can you not see anything but happiness here? But it goes deeper than that. What you don’t see is what I see when I look in his eyes. More love than any one heart can possibly hold. His tenderness, his compassion, his overwhelming sense of protection, his joy, his encouragement and most of all…his undying faithfulness. This enormous, overwhelming feeling totally engulfs me as I type this and I can’t even think of a word to describe it. Love. But yet, it still doesn’t feel like the right word. Like, this word is too small to describe the feeling. It far exceeds any emotion I’ve ever experienced. Remember that feeling you got when you gave birth to your first child? This comes pretty damn close to it.